Work is Boring - General
30 Dec 2005 @ 02:22 am - because it's the holidays and everyone except me is on vacation. my phone is silent. my equipment is checked in. noone's online. so i sit here with my thoughts and occasional voices (which is never good).... ehe... I am excited about one thing t...

Hmm... noone knows who's next. - General
24 Dec 2005 @ 05:30 am - The hijinks never end around here it seems... some more festivities for a 50th birthday... [img]/users/roen/journal/files/1135366194-MVC-003S.JPG[/img][img]/users/roen/journal/files/1135366205-MVC-004S.JPG[/img]...

The Ghost of Wire Management - General
23 Dec 2005 @ 01:39 am - [img]/users/roen/journal/files/1135265804-MVC-001S.JPG[/img][img]/users/roen/journal/files/1135265824-MVC-002S.JPG[/img] This morning we all came into work and found John's office doorway like this. The note reads: I am the Ghost of Wire Manag...

Maz is here!!! WOO HOO!!!! - General
09 Dec 2005 @ 12:08 pm - Well I haven't written in a looong time because i've just been having so much fun with Maz here! We're having a wonderful time (at least i am anyway...i HOPE he is!) we've gone to the movies and driven around this winter wonderland sliding all the ...

Well I survived - General
29 Nov 2005 @ 04:31 am - The show has come and gone and I didn't die from extreme anxiety! woo hoo! Honestly, i was so nervous i can't believe it. I've recieved some very good feedback on the dr. phil website message boards, the schizophrenia.com message boards, and from f...

Stressing - General
23 Nov 2005 @ 07:44 am - the show airs tomorrow... i'm stressing big time. we're talking squirrels in the belly stressing. i hope i didn't make an ass of myself. i'm just going to disassociate myself from the woman on the tv when i watch. i'm going to watch like it's som...

totally out of my element - General
20 Nov 2005 @ 09:54 am - I got invited to a 'body shop' party my only friend here was having. i went. though i didn't want to. i hate being around alot of people i don't know. so Maz, i totally understand how you may feel when you are around my extended family and i promis...

ugh no coffee - General
19 Nov 2005 @ 03:43 am - I have no coffee today. I ran out yesterday and forgot to bring some in. I'm supposed to go to the gym tonight too. so much for energy. i decided that chinese spicy veggies and rice sounded good and i had to get money out of the atm and get my gy...

Maz's Visit - General
16 Nov 2005 @ 12:26 am - Well good morning everyone. I am now finally wide awake thanks to 2 provigils :D I asked my boss if I could leave at 3:00 on Wednesday the 23rd so I could go home and watch/tape my show. He said it shouldn't be a problem. I was surprised because ...

my kitty sam - General
12 Nov 2005 @ 08:05 am - is so sweet. his favorite spot lately has been on my left arm as i type on the computer and surf the net. he's warm and he purrs and he's soft and it's just so damn cute!... Every now and then i'll pause and pet him reverently now and then i'll jus...

the show - General
11 Nov 2005 @ 05:49 am - will air on Wednesday November 23rd. Not sure if you folks in Aus. are on the same schedule or not though. Just watch for the one titled 'schizophrenia' *big cheesy grin*[comment]Is there anyone there who can record it on PC for Lisa? Video tapes...

work and stuff - General
09 Nov 2005 @ 02:46 am - a couple of days ago steve (my boss) came into my office and asked me to not talk about dr. phil or my disability anymore. he was afraid it would come back on him due to privacy laws regarding medical conditions. i asked him if i were in a wheelcha...

another sleepless night - General
08 Nov 2005 @ 07:59 pm - I don't know what it is, but I just seem to wake up sometime between 1 am and 3 am and can't get back to sleep. It is driving me nuts because of course i am tired all day. i even take sedatives to fall asleep. sigh. wakefully, Roe...

Becoming Famous - General
03 Nov 2005 @ 06:40 am - Well, the National Schizophrenia Foundation headquartered here in Lansing called me. Remember they met me at the airport on my way to the Dr. Phil Show and took my picture with the CEO and the packet of information he was giving me? She'd said (Lau...

Is anyone listening? - General
02 Nov 2005 @ 12:02 am - I get the feeling the audience is empty. I hear crickets. I know my life is boring but a comment or two would help me know i'm not talking to myself. alonely, Roe[comment]Lol, doesnt it get boring having the same 2 people commenting on your ...

Happy Samhain! - General
31 Oct 2005 @ 08:45 pm - Happy Samhain and Halloween to everyone!... Jake is going this year as a remote control...lol his costume is really cute. they made it out of stiff posterboard/cardboard and it's all black with white buttons on the front, rewind, ffw, menu, etc......

The Dr. Phil Taping/ Los Angeles/ Hollywood - General
30 Oct 2005 @ 02:54 am - Well, Tuesday afternoon we took off for hollywood. we had a connecting flight in cincinatti, ohio. The wait wasn't too terribly long and i had ken and joel and gabriella (his wife) to talk to. anyway we arrive in LAX and go down to the baggage cla...

baking cakes.. - General
25 Oct 2005 @ 10:59 am - I was really hoping to talk to you Maz and Lisa too before I leave for Hollywood... I am up baking cakes to freeze for the wedding cake i have to make when i get back on thursday night and friday. I'm very tired but i have two more cakes to make t...

GUESS WHAT????? - General
22 Oct 2005 @ 06:36 am - I just got a call from Joel's office. HE'S COMING WITH ME ON THE SHOW!!!!! i am SOOOOO relieved. between him and ken i should be ok. they are my safety net... oh Thank God!!!! I'm so excited..... [comment]You will be great. We're all excited for...

They want to feature me!!!! - General
19 Oct 2005 @ 06:29 am - the Dr. Phil show called finally! they want to feature me.. they're coming to my house this weekend to do an at home interview and then i'll go tape the show next wednesday. i'm SO NERVOUS!!! i'm gonna go puke now.. more later. [comment]OMG WOW!! ...

Nothing yet.... - General
18 Oct 2005 @ 03:33 am - After a sleepless weekend carrying the phone with me even into the bathroom, they haven't called or acknowledged that they even got my pictures yet. She seemed like she was in such a hurry because of their "deadlines" i imagine i would hav...

They Called!!!! - General
15 Oct 2005 @ 09:45 am - I can't believe it, but within about 3 hours after emailing my story to the Dr. Phil show they CALLED!!! they asked for pictures of me which i emailed today. she said that my story was very interesting and she was going to show my story to the pro...

Dr. Phil and Flat Tires - General
15 Oct 2005 @ 02:05 am - Well, Hello everyone. I got a nice surprise this morning. After the staff meeting at work, one of the techs, Matt... came into my office and told me my driver's side rear tire was flat. So I called Ken and he came out to fix it. I just sent an e...

6 am - General
11 Oct 2005 @ 08:29 pm - Well i woke up at 5 this morning starving. i didn't eat much yesterday which is probably why i'm hungry now. i have a pot pie in the oven.. chicken with potatoes, carrots, and peas... i did next to nothing for the last 3 days. yesterday was a holi...

Piano Lessons - General
08 Oct 2005 @ 02:38 am - Sigh, how pathetic is it to find piano lessons erotic? LOL Yesterday's lesson didn't get much accomplished. Neither Sean nor I had gotten any sleep the night before. Me, because.. well.. i'm just me. and him, he had a gig in Novi the night befor...

Hollywood - General
28 Sep 2005 @ 12:33 am - My sister sent an email to the "Dr. Phil Show" about her marriage to Nate... how he is so abusive and everything. Well shock of shocks.. they called her and asked her to come on the show! They also called Nate and asked him to be on the ...

Financial stability once again. - General
11 Sep 2005 @ 05:40 am - Well I'm back on track.. more than back on track actually. woo hoo! Money is flowing again. I haven't had a set back like that since i first moved back to michigan!... It was a stupid mistake on my part but everything's good now. I still hate money ...

i hate money - General
02 Sep 2005 @ 11:51 pm - Well hello all. I hope things are going better for you these last couple of weeks than they have for me. Turns out it's my own fault though. I have it arranged so all my bills come out of my account automatically. so i never pay attention because...

Ran out of gas - General
21 Aug 2005 @ 07:30 am - well a few days have passed since this happened but i am still suffering the blisterly consequences. i am usually very vigilant about how much gas i have in my car but for some reason i hadn't even paid attention until just before i ran out. i was i...

FOOD! - General
12 Aug 2005 @ 07:53 pm - Well today has been a rather uneventful day. I made it to work on time at least. We had a staff meeting at 8:00 and each week a different person is to either give a technology update (on anything.. even the space shuttle) or bring in a treat. Now I...

Cari's encounter - General
11 Aug 2005 @ 07:07 pm - Well I was 2 hours late into work this morning. I took too many sedatives last night and overslept. Cari met with mike. and when she came back all she would say is that he's evil, pure evil and she hopes to never have to set eyes on him again. ...

NOT A SEAL - General
29 Jul 2005 @ 01:37 pm - Well I guess it was fairy tale. Things like that do NOT happen to me. I contacted the Navy and this is the response I got: Please go to www.authentiseal.org/realitycheck.htm for specific information on claims most often made by SEAL imposter...

Something Odd is Afoot - General
20 Jul 2005 @ 11:25 pm - Ok something really weird is going on. I've been chatting to a guy named Matt. He's really great and we've become very close friends in a short amount of time. Actually we met when i spent 4 or 5 hours talking him out of killing himself. He's a N...

awake at 3 a.m - General
08 Jul 2005 @ 07:31 am - hi everybody.. yes it's 3 am and i'm awake for the moment. i had to pee and of course i couldn't be awake without checking my email. lol i'm hopelessly addicted to the net.. i had a discussion the other day with someone over which would be harder ...

Drugs and more drugs.... - General
05 Jul 2005 @ 07:12 pm - Well here i am again, at work watching the clock. 2 more hours to go until i can go home and do the same thing that i do at work.... talk online. lol. At least my pointy haired boss is on vacation. woo hoo! Julie is still with me though she's ta...

In Hiding.... - General
02 Jul 2005 @ 09:34 pm - Well, Julie's been here a week and Nate hasn't found her. Hopefully he'll just leave her alone. She's in the process of getting a restraining order on him. The 4th of July holiday has interrupted the process though. We've been hanging out watchin...

Guests - General
26 Jun 2005 @ 03:59 pm - Yesterday i went up to the lake where my sister kristine has a cottage. i didn't really want to go but i did because it was my chance to see my dad and gail before they go to alaska. Anyway, my sister julie showed up and explained that she had just...

Tired - General
23 Jun 2005 @ 02:09 pm - SOOO TIRED... I've been dragging all week but yesterday and today are particularly bad. Yesterday seemed to take forever. I swear I looked at the clock yesterday and it was 1:30. I looked at it again about an hour later and it was 1:40. That's h...

a good monday - General
20 Jun 2005 @ 08:23 pm - Today was a good Monday. My friend Kelley did very well in her surgery for breast cancer today. She's currently sleeping off the anesthetic. They said she did so well she may be able to go home tonight. Score 1 for her: Cancer 0. Next is chemoth...

Late AGAIN - General
16 Jun 2005 @ 05:50 pm - I did it again today. I laid down after my shower and fell back asleep. I was 10 minutes late again. I don't think anyone noticed though. I hope not. I got weighed last night and lost a pound and a half. I made the mistake though, of going to t...

Late - General
15 Jun 2005 @ 03:44 pm - I overslept this morning and was 10 minutes late to work. I don't think anyone noticed (i hope not). I was just so tired. I didn't get home from my MRI until after midnight because they were running behind. Anyway the other biggest thing to happ...

Maz's trip - General
14 Jun 2005 @ 09:45 pm - The whole trip is booked and ready for the end of november to come along! I can't believe I have to wait SIX MONTHS!!! I'm so excited I can't stand it. Well at least that gives me 6 months to clean the house (lol). Seriously whenever I'm down now ...

Maz is coming to vis-it! - General
10 Jun 2005 @ 06:07 pm - Sorry it's been so long since I've written. Some great news is on the horizon! Maz is coming to vis-it! Maz is coming to vis-it! We booked the flight today. Now we're just waiting on the itinerary so we can book the connecting flights from LA to...

Fun with Schizophrenia - General
19 May 2005 @ 10:15 pm - Ok, about my hospital stay. This time i met a number of interesting people. First there was Matt, who I saw at the pdoc's office today. He brought his guitar with him to the hospital and he'd play and sing. He was discharged a couple days after I ...

Hospital - General
17 May 2005 @ 01:52 pm - Well I just got out of the hospital. Again. What a long strange trip it's been. First I had to go to the emergency room at Sparrow hospital. After talking to the doctor there, they got me a bed at the mental hospital. When I got there, they took...

Hospital Again? - General
06 May 2005 @ 04:21 pm - I went and saw my shrink yesterday. I told her about the voices and hallucinations being bad again. And that I was suicidal because it would have been Anne's sweet 16 on Sunday. Mother's day of all days. She upped my geodon. now i'm on 400mg a d...

My Final Exam - General
03 May 2005 @ 11:54 pm - I can't believe it but I got them ALL right. 100%. Boy am I glad that's over. Maz go home and go to sleep ((((hugs)))) Woo hoo! No more class. Not for awhile. Now we just have to get Ken a job. I'll have more time to exercise now. I'm worn o...

studying and stuff. - General
03 May 2005 @ 12:28 am - Well I've finally studied as much as is going to do me any good. I'll take the test tomorrow night after work. I don't hold out much hope that I'll keep my 4. but I should at least pass it. I've been having a hard time concentrating lately. Part ...

Final Exam - General
02 May 2005 @ 05:18 pm - Well I had a hell of a weekend trying to study for my final exam this week. I had hoped to finish my practice final over the weekend and take the real final today but I'm having more trouble than i thought i would with the practice questions. It ap...

Almost 20 Pounds!! - General
28 Apr 2005 @ 01:57 pm - Well I got weighed for the week last night and I lost 3.5 pounds this week! I am so happy because the last few weeks it's been 1.5 or 2 at most. This last week I even ate once every day too. I've started replacing the last two drinks of the day wi...

Late this morning... - General
26 Apr 2005 @ 02:01 pm - I was a couple minutes late for work this morning. I had two things working against me. One, I couldn't get out of bed until 7:10 and Two, when I finally did get out to my car on time, the driver's seat was broken and wouldn't slide forward. Ken h...

My Algebra Test - General
26 Apr 2005 @ 12:05 am - I'm so pissed!!!! I got all the questions on the test RIGHT. Even the bonus question! But they marked me down one because I wrote outside the line a little bit with my answer to a question. It was the RIGHT answer but I didn't have enough space t...

Bored - General
25 Apr 2005 @ 08:32 pm - Well today has been a long and boring day at work. I had to burn about a million cd's for the new guy. Lots of software. I'm a little nervous about my test tonight. I don't feel completely comfortable with the material. But it's due today so I'm...

School's almost over - General
24 Apr 2005 @ 10:02 pm - It's Sunday evening. I just finished my homework and did the practice test. I didn't do too badly considering. I'm sort of half watching Van Helsing. It's pretty cheesy. I'm terrifically bored. Even the voices are quiet today. I'm going to tak...

Shaun of the Dead - General
23 Apr 2005 @ 01:33 pm - It's 9:30 on saturday. It's snowing here if you can believe that. I watched Shaun of the Dead last night. It was funny. It's a comedy/zombie movie. I had a chance to get mcdonald's last night. Ken and Jake got some but I stuck with my stupid di...

therapy and bombs - General
22 Apr 2005 @ 12:11 am - Today I saw my therapist after work. It went ok. I always wish i had more time with him. He's really great. I don't know what i'll do if he dies or moves far away or something. My friend Debi's therapist died last week and she's been having an an...

Weight and Voices - General
21 Apr 2005 @ 02:29 pm - Well the damage to the Mustang is going to cost 500 dollars to fix. I missed my schizophrenics anonymous meeting on tuesday because I had to go to uni. I wasn't able to go on Monday because I had an appointment with the behaviorist at the weight ma...

Busy Day - General
14 Apr 2005 @ 04:21 pm - Today i had to go to the clerks office at the courthouse to get a copy of Jake's birth certificate. he's going on a school field trip to Canada. Niagra Falls. we searched and searched for his birth certificate but we couldn't find it. we have a ba...

Fucked up kids shows - General
09 Apr 2005 @ 12:33 pm - it's 8:30(ish) on a Saturday morning and i'm watching sesame street. i forgot how fucked up kids shows can be. Jacob is sleeping on the couch and left the tv on last night. it's on a kid's channel that usually shows older kids shows during the aft...

A Day in the Life.... - General
07 Apr 2005 @ 01:16 pm - Ah, another boring day at work. My life is such a routine I don't quite know what to write about. I went to the weight management center last night and got weighed and went to class. I lost 1.5 pounds which isn't much but considering I cheated wit...

Math Problem - General
06 Apr 2005 @ 04:55 pm - Ok folks I have a math problem I need help with. I need to list my reasoning for each step. I need to guess a number based on the following clues: It's a 3 digit whole number One digit is a 3 It is an even number It is greater than 499 The s...

Hospital - General
30 Mar 2005 @ 09:42 pm - It's been a long time since i've written. My last journal entry was about 12 pounds ago and a hospitalization ago. I'd been increasingly anxious as the weeks had passed. every day it grew. then i became extremely paranoid and my voices started tel...

Week 1 - General
10 Mar 2005 @ 03:41 pm - I just started this liquid diet today. Had my breakfast of a chocolate flavored water concoction and coffee.... lunch will be another of said concoction although i might mix it with coffee instead of water this time. i have vanilla flavored too.. ...

vanilla sky - General
07 Mar 2005 @ 02:13 pm - Oh how i wish i could stop everything by screaming "Tech suppoooooort!!!!" I'm surrounded by demons and I know they are all coming from him. i've even seen him so i know he's following me. i'm going to defend myself if i have to. I had ...

Paranoia, liquid diets, and more fun stuff - General
02 Mar 2005 @ 02:48 pm - I've been horribly paranoid the last couple of weeks. It's growing in intensity. Ken called my shrink (pdoc, psychiatrist, whatever) and told them i was having issues. They said to take my meds early and take an extra klonopin and to call my shrin...

Liquid diets and other atrocities - General
09 Feb 2005 @ 03:10 pm - Yes, I'm going on a liquid diet through my hospital here in town. They monitor you through the whole thing and they say I will lose approx. 5 pounds per week. I want to be thin again. My orientation is on monday. I'll learn more about the monitor...

Movies and Other Stuff - General
01 Feb 2005 @ 02:12 pm - I've been having a great time with movies lately. Of course there's always the Lord of the Rings movies for a good movie watching evening but the latest one to knock me out is The Village by M. Night Shyamalan. School is going well. I got a 96% ...

Stuff - General
25 Jan 2005 @ 02:06 pm - Hello again. Lots has been going on. We finally got moved in, although Ken has yet to bring in most of his stuff from his house, everything of mine is moved and (mostly) organized. School has been going ok. I got a 90% on the first test, which ...

Moving Day - General
13 Jan 2005 @ 04:01 pm - ..is tomorrow. When I get out of work, I get the keys to the townhouse. It will be nice to have so much more room. Once I'm in and settled, then Ken will be moving back in with me. The divorce hearing was on Tuesday but I didn't go so they'd dismi...

First Day of School - General
11 Jan 2005 @ 09:32 pm - I had my first day of school after 16 years yesterday. I got off to a bad start when i put my ID/Parking Pass in the slot at the entrance it said i had a negative balance and kept my card! i had to stand in line to get it back. turns out when they g...

Class - General
04 Jan 2005 @ 02:36 pm - Well my class starts next week. I'm not looking forward to it because it's a math lab with no instructor and I don't know what I'm doing!!! It was the only first step math class available though. We'll see how it goes I guess. The plus side to th...